1Malaysia for All....

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fabianyee

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Taken from this site: http://nose4news.wordpress.com/2009/12/14/sabah-sarawak-to-be-relocated/What say you?***********************************************December 14, 2009...3:43 pm Sabah & Sarawak to be relocated Jump to Comments KUALA LUMPUR — In an effort to strengthen national unity and in line with the 1Malaysia concept, Prime Minister Datuk Seri Mohd Najib Tun Razak announced today that the East Malaysian states of Sabah and Sarawak would be moved to the peninsula. BEFORE: Sabah and Sarawak in their current location Speaking at a Press conference after a Cabinet meeting, Najib said that the relocation was necessary to ensure that the nation’s different peoples would not have any more physical boundaries to mix around. “We’ve had the vast South China Sea separating the two Malaysias for the longest time now,” said the Prime Minister excitedly. “It’s time to close the gap, and allow our different races, tribes and cultures to naturally immerse with one another.” The relocation plan is scheduled to start next year, with reclamation works commencing in May. AFTER: The new, unified '1Malaysia' Malaysia “It’s a big project, costing well over RM850 trillion,” said Najib. “The project would take 10 years to complete, since we’d need to move all the soil, water sources, flora, fauna, man-made structures and of course, the people. But it’ll be worth it, since we’ll truly be 1Malaysia.” The two huge states, spanning nearly 200,000 square kilometres, are now part of the greater Borneo island together with Brunei Darussalam and the part of Indonesia called Kalimantan, but would be joined with the eastern side of Peninsular Malaysia. “The states would be reconstructed almost exactly identical to how they are now,” said Najib. “This would ensure that the natives would not feel ‘out of place’ when they move back to their relocated homes. “Of course, we might ‘improve’ some things when we rebuild the states. We’re thinking, maybe Mount Kinabalu could be higher than Everest. I mean, why not? It’s not every day that you get to change what nature has given us. “And if we take the soil from inside Gua Niah and use it to add on Mount Kinabalu’s height, we’d get both a bigger cave and taller mountain, effectively rewriting two Guinness World Records. Now that’s what I call value for money!” Asked what the neighbouring Brunei and Indonesia had to say about the move, Najib said that he had discussed the issues with the leaders of both nations. “His Majesty the Sultan of Brunei did ask me why we were taking Sabah and Sarawak away, leaving his kingdom just a group of tiny islands in the middle of the South China Sea. The Indonesian president also voiced his concern,” said the PM. “However, I told them that we all need to ‘hijrah’ to better ourselves, and that neighbours move away all the time. And I also reassured them that although we may be physically further after this, we would always be close in our hearts. They were very understanding. “Besides, after this, there’d be no more issue of illegal smuggling across the borders and such.” On protests by the Kelantan state government, citing the ‘loss of a coastline’ and ‘off-shore petroleum’, Najib said that this is of national interest, and the opposition-held state administration should not be so selfish. “These people simply refuse to understand the importance of 1Malaysia. They keep on looking a the small things like the death of their fishing industry or the loss of billions of ringgit of income. “Serves the Kelantanese people right for voting in such small-minded leaders.”***********************************************BTW, if you actually think what u read is real... Get someone next to you to give you 1 big tight slap... Read the comments and I laughed even harder as there are actually MORONS who took the article seriously. As someone responded, 'Sarcasm is wasted on the stupids'
 
hahahahahahaha...
So sad. very few of them seem to get it. This reflect how they are thinking and have NO sense of humor+with so low IQ to differentiate truth from fiction.!(pardon me)
the comments really make me lough.....
 
is this true ar?? wahhh...like that Jean Todt island no more dy, he might move Ferrari to thailand now....hmm....
 
Here's the Editor's response to those moronic comments

Source: http://nose4news.wordpress.com/2009/12/15/nose4news-editor-commits-seppuku/


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December 15, 2009...2:18 am

Nose4news editor commits seppuku

Jump to Comments
KUALA LUMPUR — Hassan Skodeng, the editor of Nose4news, a weblog that posts absolutely fake news, has committed ’seppuku’, the Japanese custom of killing one’s self by stabbing one’s self with a sword, after a considerable number of readers believed the crap he put online.
In a written statement found beside his cold carcass, Hassan said that he couldn’t take how fucking dumb some people can be, believing the bullshit he concocted, despite putting so many obvious qualifiers about the false nature of his posts.









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“It embarrasses me how these so-called cyber-literate oafs can react so angrily at the jokes I write. I tell them early on, from the get-go, that it’s all absolute fiction, total horsecrap. True lies. And yet they still think what I write is true.”
Hassan also expressed his disappointment that the image of Pinocchio with an elongated nose and the line “The truth is out there (not in here)” wasn’t enough to convince some readers that he’s only kidding, and that whatever he spews out on the site is utter bull.
“You’d think that everyone who could read would know the story of Pinocchio and how his nose would grow longer if he lied,” wrote Hassan, in his own blood. “And when I used the X-Files line of ‘The Truth is Out there, not in here’, what the fucking hell did they think I meant with that?”
Hassan added that he regrets making his fib tales sound too realistic.
“I should have stayed away from realistic things like relocating entire states and people going up to outer space to evade the law. Or retired politicians becoming Care Bears and stuff. Those sound completely plausible.
“I should’ve stuck to writing about Voltron and Ultraman,” he said. “I’m sure no dumbass with an ounce of intelligence would believe that they exist.
“Maybe.”


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