Here's an update to my earlier posting
Got my vanos fixed, rather than replaced. I also noticed a few other threads of other models like the E46, E60 having the same problems of jerking when coming to a halt.
Most importantly, after 4 months, I finally had the time to get my ride over to M-Scope for the adaptation procedure on the gearbox. Essentially they plug in some pretty large device into the diagnostic port, and go for a pretty long drive, simulating various driving situations, braking, acceleration etc. Essentially, they were getting the "computer" to relearn certain things. After about 45 minutes, the adaptation had been completed.
Result: Fantastic, no more jerks when coming to a halt.
So before you listen to folks that tell you to replace your gear box and part with your $$$, try this adaptation thing first. Every other advise I had before this from BMW specialists was to change the box. M-Scope is a gearbox rebuild specialist and they nailed it on the initial diagnosis, although they sent me off to get my vanos fixed first.
Hope this helps. Cheers.